8.09.2006

Overwhelmed again

It's 1:45am. I'm supposed to have 5 chapters for my two classes read by friday at the latest. It's now Wednesday, and I only have 1 chapter done. I bought two new notebooks today, and one of them is wide-ruled, so I can't use it. Someone very important is very sick. My parents are mad at me (nothing new). I can't find my glasses. I was supposed to be going to the gym everyday this week, and I haven't gone at all. What's more, I'm afraid I won't go tomorrow morning. I think I'm gaining weight again. The pressure is piling up on me and I just wish my parents would lay off, because that would help a lot.
My aunt is coming up from L.A. this weekend to a nearby airport, and my parents don't trust me to pick her up by myself. I pretty much expected it, but now I'm thinking: Blind people, people who can't read, people who don't speak English, they can get through an airport. I can see and I'm not illiterate, and they don't think I'll know which parking lot to go into. Is this really the image my parents have of me? Is this what I show them? That's sick. Pathetic. I don't have time to worry about that.
I have to get a lot of important work done tomorrow, but I really really really need to get to the gym.
I feel so sick right now. Sick with worry. I wish I didn't have to go home this weekend. I wish I didn't have to work. I wish my parents didn't know my schedule so I could stay here and catch up on everything. I want to pull my hair out. I have to go to the gym tomorrow, to release this frustration, anger, fear, worry if to accomplish nothing else. I won't be able to sleep tonight, that's something I don't need with a 2 hour midmorning class and a 3 hour evening class tomorrow. Where are my glasses???
I'm going to try to get something done.